Life really is a funny old thing, as much as it has been said, and as much as I've experienced it, I still try my utmost to defy the saying "Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans." But being me, with my slight OCD tendencies and my constant need to achieve things I put on lists... I can't just let go and let the wind take me where it will...
I'm a pretty simple girl who wants simple things, all I want is for one of my five-year plans to go according to, well, plan... For instance, by now, I should be 3 months away from my "year in Barcelona" (& probably have some type of conversational Spanish under my belt) Instead, I've only just picked up my passport (yes, I look like a murderer in my photograph). Thank-You Home Affairs for your "excellent" service (only you could turn a week into 2.5 months)!
I don't blame the government though (this time), I blame myself. Next to my dear friend, Staci, I'm probably the most indecisive person I know. This stems from a combination of my need to be a people-pleaser and a perfectionist. (I'm also gonna go ahead and blame Murphy - who I picture as a short, chubby, lonesome man - I swear the bugger follows me around constantly!)
If I had to be selfish and aloof I would be elbow deep in a bowl of sangria somewhere on the sunny beaches of Catalonia, but no, I'm sensible and rational! I think I've only had about 3 spontaneous nights this year...
Oi Vey.
According to this personality test I did the other day I should be talented at devising systems and plans for action, this is probably where my love of five-year plans and lists comes from... My first five-year plan I made in my twilight years of high school (not the movie phase, the actual time period). Sometimes I still look at that piece of black paper with the gold writing (yes, I am also a hoarder) and make myself feel good with all I have achieved... Drivers License, Degree, Internship (of which I'm 6 months into), they are small achievements but they do wonders for those "I-Hate-The-World" days!
As much as plans often fail, it's impossible for me not to plan. However, with Spring very much here (I can tell by the endless sneezing) I've decided to take a fresh look at how I plan. Take each day as it comes and all that other airy-fairy, laissez faire approach to life, not to get too sad when plans fail. I think I'm going to be vague with my goals and that way I'll always feel a sense of achievement. Or I'll just be surprised by what life has in store.. (atleast I'll try).
In case someone wanted to surprise me for my birthday or Christmas, here's a hint... (Don't tell my mom, or Lola and Koda)
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